I have lived a lot of my life terrified.

I was terrified when my parents divorced. Then more terrified, even though I didn’t know it at the time, when my sister went to live with my dad and I was living with my mom and was alone most of the time.

I was terrified when I had my first baby and I was in a state where I didn’t know anyone and my military husband was gone all of the time.

I was terrified when I got divorced.

I was terrified when I was in nursing school that I wouldn’t be good enough to pass and wouldn’t be able to support my children.

I was terrified a lot when I was a nurse realizing that repurcussions from a mistake could have life threatening consequences.

I was terrified with the oklahoma bombing, columbine shooting, Feeney murders, the 3 women disappeared from Springfield… 9/11.

I was terrified after my car accident and when I couldn’t work any more.

I was terrified caring for my mom as she died and still scared as I supported my dad when he died.

I was terrified when my son went to prison.

Life can be shitty. I am not saying it’s not.

I know that the terror that people are feeling right now is real.

Damn, I worry about gay and transgender people. I worry about the mexicans and womens rights and… so many things.

But life can also be beautiful.

We choose what we see.

Do we choose to see total darkness and fear?

Or do we understand that while there may be some darkness that the world needs our light more than ever.

Anger and rage will make things worse.

Don’t become immobilized. I am speaking from experience here. Life kicked my ass. I ended up immobilized with fear and wasted much of my life. I learned lessons from all of that and the biggest lessons were-hiding doesn’t help and that people need people.

Hide for a minute. Or a day. Do not be immobilized. Surround yourself with good people that you care about. Don’t watch the news all of the time or stay on Facebook all of the time. Get away from the news. Go outside.

And most of all-gather yourself and fight. Not the angry fighting. The organized fight. Fight for your rights and for your friends. Don’t wait for someone else to do it. Become an activist or support an activist.

But remember to fight the fight with love.